The TV crackles, the familiar voice of David Attenborough breaks through............. "Here,..... in dry Savannah of the Border Country of the verdent Lambkarahi plains..., we wait......, at this time of year, if we wait.....patiently, and listen........., we might just hear the roar upon the soil of the gathered herds that constitute this quite remarkable spectacle of nature.......that of the mass migration of 'Wildebikes' heading from the great northern watering holes............. gathered by the gutteral pack call of "gauntyracastle", to a particular social gathering spot in County Durham. No one quite know why so many gather to migrate to southern climes on this particular weekend.... but we'll leave that one for the social anthropoligists to ponder......................" knock, knock.... 'huv you got a TV licence?' ...... er ......." Well I can put old Davey boy right and I don't need a degree on social anthropologification to figure it out. Stormin the Castle is fixed date in many folks diaries, both north and south of the border because it's a great party. Great company, Great music, Great Bike Show and everything else that goes to making a great party. This year, for a change, the sungods had been suitably appeased and shone brightly upon our countenances, wherever they are, perhaps that's why it hurts when I sit down. When the weather is this good it's time to depart as early as possible and catch the day. Judging by the number of folk I met on the '68 they had the same idea.

Run.......... fur the Road

It takes years off him

Marty and meself arrived at midday, the site was already very busy, field one was near full and field two was getting there, after last year it look like everyone pre booked and came early. All the more time to drink and lie around in the sun I say. This is my tenth Stormin, I figure I just don't learn and keep coming back for more. First order of the day this year was to catch up with me mate Pugwash, he'd come up from Kent to do some marshalling only to have his chop run over by a truck which was reversing, he had to travel the last leg with no brakes, that would be a challenge to anyone's senses, especially on the A1.

Mel frightens some small children

Regular readers may have a slight incling that I am fond the ol' 'Hayseed Dixie' , so it'll come as no surprise that I was particularly looking forward to their set. I missed Tubesnake, Faith Healer and Rattlesnake Road but I understand they aquitted themselves well with Faith Healer reportedly going down vey well. The big tent was heaving by the time Hayseed came on stage. I find that their music polarises people's opinions, ye either love 'em or ye hate them (but some folk have no taste ;-) either way there's no denying that these guys can REALLY play,

I could only see the front half of the marquee from the bear pit and it was jumping. After their set, John Wheelan told me that they had been booked by their agent to play 'Top Of The Pops', eek, an unlikely outlet for the guys, he was particularly pissed at the fact that he wasn't gonna see 'The Damned'. I caught it yesterday on BBC2, I think they were taking the piss with the big racoon eyes ;-)

Gen & Co modelling this year's 'must have' marshall's fashion over garments

Since Jack was on holiday, I'd brought my old friend Arthur (of the black and tan variety) , he was beginning to get the better of me as the late hours approached so I wandered without the aid of a torch I may add, back through the candle-lit gatherings and bletherings scattered around the site. By the time I'd stopped for a blether several times the sun was poking it's neb over the horizon. Four hours later in me tent I confirmed my suspicions that all advertising is lies, as I discovered that, contrary to what Sachet & Scratchit would have you believe "Guinness is NOT good for you", indeed it will keep you face down until at least lunchtime. In proper Scottish style I opted for a hearty breakfast of a Fish Supper washed down with a can of Irn-Bru, I like to start the day as I mean to finish it, arse about face !. But hey, I felt soooo much better. ............... well until Trouble near made me barf when she made me laugh so much it hurt as we considered our new business idea which involves donuts and ringtones and ironically small voices.

A prime feature of Stormin' is the custom show, when volunteers to run it were requested, everyone took one step backwards and Tim was left standing out in front, should've been quicker off the mark TIm ;-) . In the past it had been commented upon that there were too many "standard" or "just bolt catalogue shit on" bikes in the show, so this year Pugwash had been delegated the task of vetting the entries, after all the chance of a free T-Shirt has been known to be be just too tempting for owners of standard bikes to enter just to get one.

Consequently a few owners of Boom Trikes were disappointed at being turned away, I won't win any popularity contests but I agree, these are production bikes, just like a lot of harleys are 'factory' customs. There's more to custom bikes than bolting on Arlen Ness stuff. But, that's just my opinion, arguments in ink marker on the back of a postage stamp please. Personally I think, mostly due to the vetting, that the quality of bikes in the show was excellent, an opinion shared by many I spoke to. Nearly a hundred examples from mild to wild. Blue, Eddie (from the Honda)stand and myself were appointed as "daft enough to agree to judge the show". All eighteen categories !. It wasn't too difficult to pick out enough winners, erm, categorising them was the hard bit ;-). The 3x3 trike won Best British by virute of it being a range rover engine, I really liked the cut of it's imaginary jib, it should've been matt black though. I sensed that, conversely, it was making Blue quite queasy ;-)

Veece was down to his last fingernail

Animal hadn't intended to attend, he was glad he did now.

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